You're the cleverest bro that you know
Huckin' beer cans out the window
At every maybe-female passerby you see
But don't throw that shit at me, sir
Or you might just find your keister
Laid out flat on the sidewalk
Or the bottom of the sea
Hey now move out of my way
You car of drunken fucks
Fiercely I'll defend the frontiers
Of this crosswalk
Hey now move out of my way
Cuz there's a bar across the street
And a dumbass makes a pirate
Want a whiskey on the rocks
All I wanna do is drink my drink
But a passing glance makes you think
That you'd like me more
With your hands upon my hips
Well I might not get another bourbon here
If I pin your balls to the wall
With the point of my spear
But you chose to meddle
With the wrong Pirate
And Davey Jones' Locker
Is custom fit
Hey move out of my way
All you drunken fucks
Grab my ass
And I will slit your goddamn throat
Hey don't look so upset
You'll deserve just what you you'll get
There's a few rules
Every modern pirate knows
And I'm the wrong pirate to fuck with!!!
Got some friends who'd like to meet you
They're the barnacles that greet you
When your body is dragged
Across this good this good ship's keel
Keep your hands in your pockets
If you want your eyes in their sockets
This is not the kind of booty you can steal
Motherfucker!
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